never (adverb): not ever; at no time, not under any condition | quit (verb): give up, leave, abandon, drop

“God remembered us when we were down, His love never quits.” Psalm 136:23

 In my own story, there have been so many times that I’ve felt like I have disappointed God. So many times that my selfishness or doubt or shame has kept me from hearing him, from knowing his love, from fully enjoying the life he wanted to give to me.

I stopped going to church in college after years of going faithfully–Sunday mornings, Sunday nights, Wednesday nights, youth choir, prayer group.  Burned out. Questioning. Disillusioned.

I was disappointed.

I studied to become a teacher–not necessarily feeling “called” to this profession, but being determined to come out of college with a job with benefits and a secure income.  

I was unsure.

I fell in love with and married a wonderful man who was not going to be a pastor, a missionary, or even the “spiritual leader” of our home. Even though we had so much love and joy in our relationship, I wondered if I had messed up God’s “plan” for my family.

I felt guilty.

In more recent years, even though my relationship with God had become wonderfully close and growing again, I began to struggle desperately with anxiety, panic, and self-doubt. I beat myself up wondering if my prescription for anxiety medication meant my faith in God wasn’t strong enough.

I felt like a failure.

I have felt like quitting countless times.

But God never did.

He gently drew me back to church over time. It was a sweet moment of singing worship songs at our son’s Christian preschool that tugged at my heart and inspired me to find a church for our family.

In my career as a teacher, God has given me so many opportunities to grow closer to him. My relationships with children and their families has become a ministry of love and inspiration–both ways. God through me to them, and God through them to me.

And my marriage? God has given us so much grace–and humor! He blessed us with two wonderful sons and a loving union that is approaching a 30th anniversary. We have both grown in our understanding of God and our connection to him. We are not in official “ministry” together, but we are partners in loving our families, our community, and each other through the ups and downs and changes of this life.

The anxiety? I now think of it as a gift. As awful as it has been and still can get, God has shown me his deep tenderness and constant faithfulness that I might have never known without it. I can say from experience that it is during the scariest, saddest, and loneliest times that he comes the closest.

We have a God whose love never quits.

Invite Him In:

Just turn and talk to Jesus. No matter what you have done, what you are feeling right now, or what you are questioning, he is right there. He will never abandon or drop you–even if you feel like you might have quit on him. At no time, and under no condition, will he ever give up on you.